NICU Mommas - it can be hard to look back. But it NICU Mommas - it can be hard to look back. But it makes me that much more grateful, too. Bittersweet for sure. 🥹❤️

#nicumom #nicubaby #twinmom #takemeback
The beginning of fall with these guys! 🧡💛🖤
A big comfy sweater with button detail on the arms A big comfy sweater with button detail on the arms over top of a spaghetti strap pencil dress. Perfect and comfy for going into fall! Both are from @nadineweststyle - most of my staple pieces are! I’ve actually had this dress for a while and the top is a little “going out”, so this is a great way to wear it since we all know I’m not going out. 😆
Cohen and I enjoyed picking out fall books and doi Cohen and I enjoyed picking out fall books and doing some fun fall 🍏 activities at the library! This was on my fall bucket list, along with setting up a little book shelf display for seasonal books! I’m excited to get that set up and then we can go and pick out more books to swap out. 📚🎃🍁 #twinmom #boymom #fallactivities #fallbucketlist #fallbooks #sharethelex #lexingtonpubliclibrary
After 100 days in the cranial helmet we are finall After 100 days in the cranial helmet we are finally done! He wore it 23 hours a day most of the time. We slacked off a bit the last week or so due to him being a little sick and snotty. I was afraid he’d get overheated with a fever. His head is almost perfectly round now and I’m so thankful that we were able to do this. We weren’t sure how much correction he would actually get since we started a little late and his soft spot was not fully open. Thankfully, the helmet still worked perfectly for him! Thank you @hangernews for the wonderful care! #cranialhelmet #twinmom #boymom #hangerclinic #scaphocephaly #motherhoodjourney
Some days are harder than others. Yesterday was on Some days are harder than others. Yesterday was one of those tough days raising littles. But it’s funny, looking back at the photos from yesterday - I only see the joy. I don’t see the defeat or hear the screaming  or see the messy house I left to deal with today. 

We ate take out (they stole mine), we went on a walk to try and distract screaming babies, we did homework, we apologized to each other multiple times, we played Mario Kart, we identified an edible plant growing in our yard. 🌱 All good things.
Happy Caturday! 💙🏈😺 Happy Caturday! 💙🏈😺
Summer is fading out and fall is moving in. It’s Summer is fading out and fall is moving in. It’s bittersweet as always. ❤️ They’ll never be this little in the summertime again. 🥹☀️
Life lately. Collecting leaves even though it’s Life lately. Collecting leaves even though it’s a million degrees still, wrestling in the living room, Cohen the therapist, my twins kinda actually looking like twins 😆, big brother Landon reading books to everyone, playing games together, sick cuddles, and forever nursing my babies. 

There’s a lot going on, as usual. Life feels heavy right now. I’m carrying it the best I can. And in between all of that, there are these moments. ❤️
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Thoughts On · December 15, 2021

Tis The Season to Reflect

The past few months have been an emotional roller coaster. Extremely high highs and the lowest lows I’ve ever experienced. August and September were filled with fun and the ability to let loose a little. I got the chance to take my first ever girls trip to the beach with my best friend. I haven’t done something like that since having two little ones and it felt so good to share my favorite place with a friend and relax. Then in September, I got to see one of my favorite bands and hang out with friends a little more than usual. I had missed live music so much! September just felt so pre-covid normal and it was kind of wonderful. October snuck up on me and came in with a bang! Nate passed medic class and he officially became a paramedic, just like I knew he would! And on that same day, I found out I was pregnant! It was a whirlwind of emotions. It wasn’t something we were planning but it wasn’t something we had ruled out. When we moved into this house I envisioned three kids playing in the backyard. It felt like fate. Check the description.

I was very concerned from the beginning. I had been on birth control and I googled *all* the things that could happen. I had such a bad feeling. After my first ultrasound, it was confirmed that things looked okay but I still continued to feel off. Stress was high for me with work and everything I had on my plate. It’s so hard to explain but I still felt like things just weren’t right. I told Nate several times that I just didn’t *feel* pregnant. It’s so strange looking back on it now. We ended up losing the pregnancy and that week was truly the worst week of my life. The wondering, the confirmation, and everything that happened during that week still gives me extreme anxiety to think about. Places I went, things that happened – I haven’t been back to those places since because I just can’t. Miscarriage is one of those things that as a mother you think you can probably imagine how hard it would be, but until you experience it, you really just can’t know. And although I would never have wanted to know that pain, I feel grateful for the understanding and sympathy I have, now that it had to be part of my story. Check the Home Page.

Now we’ve made it through November to December! We took the boys to Disney World, enjoyed our Thanksgiving with family, started having our at-home date nights again, and now it’s almost Christmas! Nate was on vacation for several weeks and I was not ready for him to go back to work BUT I’m so excited that he has Christmas Eve and Christmas day off this year! That NEVER happens! I’m so looking forward to 2022 as we get ready for all of the new adventures we’ll face together. Visit theinspectorscompany.com/ site to find more info about home inspection specialists in California. Sometimes going through something really tough can make you truly appreciate where you’re at and help you get excited about the future. We’re ready for you 2022! I remember saying the same about 2021 and then laughing later on because life continued to be just as it was in 2020 – crazy and full of challenges! It’s not that I’m expecting a year of perfection and stress-free living – oh no, the opposite really! But I’m ready to jump into it with my little family because I’m excited to be here with them no matter what!

Love you all! Stay safe and have a Merry Christmas!

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In: Thoughts On · Tagged: Life Updates, Pregnancy loss, reflecting

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