I’d like to introduce all of my readers (read: my family and friends) to the huge rut I’ve been in. If you have visited my blog in the last few months or so you’ve probably already met, sort of. Like in one of those awkward situations where you should introduce yourself confidently to the new person you’ve just met, but instead you just make shy/weird eye contact. Yeah. But I’m glad I can finally and formally introduce you.
I’m not giving up on blogging. I’m not. I won’t. I’ve seen so many people talk about how so and so (blogger) should just hang it up already, quit while you’re ahead, etc. I’ve let so many little opinions on other people, which have nothing to do with me, trip me up and stop me from writing or sharing something I like or think. There are several posts that are 99% complete sitting in my draft folder. I’ve come into this space a thousand times promising that I’m “so inspired” and I have “so many ideas” and then I don’t post for a month. Some days I feel like, yeah – I could share anything here. I want to write my heart out, share experiences, and connect with others. Other days, it feels vulnerable and weird – feelings that I never truly experienced until recently. I’ve always, always been such a “heart on my sleeve” kind of person. I’m an open book and I have always liked that about myself. I still do, I’ve just become a little more guarded. I think it’s a good thing… I’m just working on finding the right balance.
I won’t make promises anymore regarding my “big ideas”. If I have them, ya know, I’ll just… execute them. There’s a big idea! I’m usually 4-5 steps ahead of myself when it comes to how inspired I feel. This is usually coffee induced excitement. I run to my blog and “shout it from the rooftops”, and then, well you know. You don’t hear from me for a month.
I will tell you what I want to do and what I hope to do: write, photograph, and document life with reckless abandon. It may be boring, imperfect, and unworthy of an audience. It may be a picture of something that someone else has already taken a similar picture of a thousand times. My thoughts and feelings may be repetitive and they will surely not be mind boggling genius. But they will be mine. I don’t have time to take a backseat to other people who are “doing it better” anymore. So keep an eye out on this space. No promises.. but I hope to be around more.
